Why Do I Write?

For far too long, I have been playing tricks on myself by buying into the idea that money is essential for me to find lasting happiness and that money is the answer that could fix any negativity. Born to a middle-class family, I was raised with this idea that money and happiness is intertwined. And like happiness, there can never be enough money. The only consolation in knowing this is that happiness could be bought with money, but the same cannot be said vice-versa.

Unfortunately, even after so many years, I only find myself growing more and more frustrated the more I stood to that saying because I felt a void in my own life. I don't feel happy despite what I have. At times, I felt discouraged and in the back of my mind, always wanted to know what it is like, if things are much more different than they are. What if I have had a choice? What if I have had different sets of values and priorities? What if I am not exactly me? These questions fueled my curiosity even more making me wanting to leave my state of mind for something fresh. I knew some part of me have considered doing so, wanting to be free and allow myself to truly discover my real self-identity, instead of an identity that was projected on me by others. Some part of me at times, have romanticized the idea of myself doing what I truly love and passionate about. But, it takes a lot of courage, courage that I at times could not muster, until now.

This blog-post is my first, and it is like a baby step that I take in my venture of self-discovery. It marks the first of my many posts that will be somewhat like my sidekick in my self-exploration to free myself from the shackles of materialism, in hopes that my actions will yield results that can make me a better, happier person.

I made a short list containing some goals on what I would like to achieve for the year :

• need to learn how to live better with less. 
• need to control my materialistic desires
• not going to be manipulated by the status-quo. 
• need to learn how to place more emphasis on experiences, and less on objects.
• need to learn to my channel negative thoughts into positive ones.  
• need to learn to find my true passion, and find my happiness through it.

These goals may appear to be vague and idealistic at the moment. But, rest assured, these goals is like this post the beginning of the journey, and they will evolve and mature as time goes by. Hopefully, 2012 will be a better year, one baby step at a time.